Beating Around The Bush

Beating Around The Bush: Guys Confuse Me

So, I've had a few friends have this happen to them, and I've probably been in this situation myself and not realised it. But yeah, there are these guys out there who seem to be too "nice" to break it to girls easily. These guys know they don't want to be with these girls or even talk to them, but instead of saying this straight out, they do obvious things that make us know it's never gonna happen, but because these guys are being so "nice", we think that maybe there's a chance we can squeeze into their lives and just stick to them. Maybe they're weak and we can break them, maybe they're being legit and just are not free EVER to hang out (Girls who think this are fooling themselves). But this isn't the case. Guys will beat around the bush until they can't take it and explode and THEN after months and months of confusing fucking around, hope and heart-ache, the girl is shut down and, if the guy has a conscience, he's going to feel like a total prick. I've got a question for all the guys that answer "Can I come over?" or "Would you like to hang out this weekend?" with a long pause and THEN after this LONG EXCRUCIATING pause say, "Oh sorry i'm busy. Maybe another time." Why don't you just say, "Actually, probably not, because to tell you the truth I'm not that into you, so much so that I'm gonna need some space before we become friends." It would be SO MUCH EASIER than making false promises of hanging out later and the girl always making efforts then being shut down by you dickheads. You men seem to think we'll give up if you keep saying "maybe next time", but we don't. We have tremendous will power when it comes to wanting a guy. We will try again and again and again, if these girls are as stupid and crazy as me they'll show up to your door, kidnap you, and take you out whether you like it or not and try to force you to like us. You NEED to just break it off at some point. TELL US YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED AND WON'T BE!!!!! It may seem dickheady now, but it will be a lot less mean than if you string us along for months and months and months then suddenly go, "FUCK OFF I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU!". We women are crazy when it comes to chasing guys. We will try until we break you down. It's just the way we are. So stop beating around the bush. Give it to us straight. It's not our fault we "can't take a hint". We're too needy to give up the chase. We're too hopeful to give you up. We're too "in love" to leave you alone. We're women, hear us beg.

Forgetting Special Occasions

The troubles of being broke

Okay, so i'm really annoyed. I get paid shit every week, and because of that I have to plan everything weekly. Unfortunately, I usually go all serious about my week, food, train fare, all that shit. This week I forgot that it would be Easter this weekend, because I forgot this I'm not able to do something that I've wanted to do for a VERY VERY long time. I was supposed to make this epic, huge ass, mother fucking GOD of an Easter egg for my boyfriend. Like, a hug Easter egg then crack it in half and add all these delicious yummy-ness to the middle, melt that shit shut and wrap it up and give it to him. But now, I can't do that because I forgot to plan to save all this money for this epic present of epic-ness. But you know what, because I get paid so shit I probably wouldn't have been able to afford it anyway.... I AM SO DAMN ANNOYED!!!!! But anyway, Easter is coming up. I'm not christian or anything, I don't celebrate Easter as the second coming of Christ. I enjoy it for the chocolate and the bunnies. The beautiful celebration of spending money for chocolate that society has made it. I don't even know how the fucking bunny came into it but fuck it, I like chocolate I love bunnies. Put them both together and I think you have a damn awesome holiday. Unless you kill a bunny and cover it in chocolate then eat that on a Sunday... That's kind of fucked. Mmmmm, bunny blood and chocolate, though a raspberry jelly filled chocolate bunny would be awesome. KILL THE BUNNY AND SUCK IT'S BLOOD!!!!! ...If it's a chocolaty jelly yumminess bunny... Yeah.

Ok, so completely not to any point according to this computer, you spell chocolaty like that < rather than chocolatey..... That's kinda weird.

Anyhoooo, happy Easter everybody. Go kill those chocolate bunnies, and remember; don't forget special occasions, you could be like me and become a sick freak who enjoys the thought of bunnies getting cut up because of it. :)

Just Waiting For Something To Happen

So, I am a very VERY lazy person. It's bloody annoying that my boyfriend is one of the most energetic people I have ever met. he's a MAN'S MAN!!!! He gets up at like five every day, goes to work as a fucking tradie, lifting up things more than twice my weight and working his ass off. He gets home and pretty much lazes around then sleeps. But on the weekend he works out, goes out to barbecues and runs around and shit. I don't wake up till like one maybe three in the afternoon. I'm a night person. I don't get my energy till about seven which is when I usually start working, and I'm in hospitality, you need to be energetic. Faking being happy is very difficult and energy consuming. But anyway. Today, my boyfriend and I are not together even though we live with each other cause of our differing sleeping patterns and energy levels. I'm kind of just waiting for a miracle to happen. Maybe one day i'll be able to be energetic when he is and we'll able to fucking RUN AROUND SCREAMING OUR HEADS OFF together and being absolute retards together rather than being annoyed at each other cause when I'm tired he's all BLAAAAAAAAAH and when he's tired I'm all BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! But yes, it is rather irritating. SO, readers, stay active and shit. Cause if you find a crazy energetic chick that wants to bang you.....You won't be able to keep up with the crazy you'll have in your bed. :)

To Smoke Or Not To Smoke; The Excitement Of Quitting

The Book That Is About To Change My Life

Okay, back story. I bought a book called "Allen Carr's EASY WAY TO QUIT SMOKING" a couple of weeks ago. I've been reading it very slowly, afraid of quitting. But tonight, the book has given me a peak into the world I am going to enter into soon and I am unbelievably excited for what is to come. The author of this book had just described some health problems that I had been having for the past couple of years that I always thought was due to anxiety/depression blah blah blah blah blah HOWEVER, I have just read a chapter where he described these things as symptoms of sickness from smoking, he also tells me that after a couple of months these had all vanished after quitting. He also had more energy at 60 as a non-smoker than 42 as a smoker. I have always been an energetic person, but for the past year or so I have been feeling run down, tired, just not bothered with the next day, scared to get up and do things. This was not all because of my depression, this was because of smoking. He described all of this as something he had and that others like him had. The fact that after reading this book, I could restore to the old, healthy, way too energetic Emily makes me so excited I could cry. You may be thinking, "Oh hey, If you're so excited why don't you quit now?" The book has said from the beginning not to quit until told to, because if you try half way (like so many other people have tried to) you will fail. So, I really want to quit now, I'm not going to let this happen to me. I can't wait until I have finished this book and my mind is able to wander and the creativity I posses is stirred up once more. I just had to share this with all of you, and if anybody reading this wants to quit smoking or has these symptoms, seriously, read the book I'm reading. I already feeling it take hold of me and make me want to quit more and make me excited to quit. I honestly just can't wait. 

Have A Good Enriching Life My Readers.

xx

Writing, Reading, Joy.

All About Me, It Involves You

I have always been obsessed with writing. As a child my father made me write stories every night, short or long, maybe even a paragraph of absolute gibberish. It was his way to allow me to express myself and enjoy the English word. I am forever great-full he opened up this side of me. Through word, through stories, I was able to learn about feelings. Words were able to move me in ways I had not experienced. It allowed my imagination to run wild, it allowed me to understand human nature, it allowed me to understand what I feel is true joy. Words have, still do and forever will move me because of my upbringing. I am so very happy about that. I keep and read a lot of things from my past. My diaries, my stories, my rants, fuck; even my assignments from school that I loved and never had the heart to throw away. This makes me understand myself, my past and how I am now. Whenever I feel something, I have the urge to write it down, as I know it will move me later in life. Even really bad depressing poems that I wrote when I was ten, can move me to tears or laughter, it will bring me back to that day, it will remind me of my sorrow and my accomplishment, my accomplishment of getting over it. It allows me to understand who I am. I wrote something while I was having a smoke, I had a thought, a feeling, something I wanted to keep hold of... This is what it is:

"I write the way I think or speak. Most that do that are in some sort of film/television. Why? So that as soon as something springs to mind they can say it and be entertaining to other people. I write because I hate people. I'm bad with people. I can't speak intelligently nor can I ever say what I really mean or want to say. I'm not a speaker, I'm a writer. When I write all I have is my pen and paper or keyboard and screen. I write to entertain myself, if you happen to enjoy what I enjoy then awesome, maybe one day i'll be a famous writer and be able to indulge myself with the fake happiness money can buy me. If not, then I shall have many memories saved for me to look back on and make me feel how I felt when I wrote a certain poem, story, rant or random sex scene. I allow memories to fill me and reminisce on my naive days and my inspiring days. I don't write to please you, I write to please myself. I like to think that's something unique about me. Those who enjoy what I write enjoy me. Enjoy the way my mind works. That knowledge is happiness money can't buy. That is the happiness you people that read what I write, fill me up with. I wish to thank you. For being a fan of me. Now; publish or buy my book when it's finished. Allow me to find others who are as crazy as me. Allow me to have more happiness. Read me. Read what I am, who I am, how I am, what I am. Read where I am in life. I hope it fills you with the emotions it fills me. 'Cause if it does, then you love me and therefore somehow love yourself. 

To My Readers.

I love you....I love me... <3 xD"

By knowing yourself you can know others. By loving yourself you can love others. To put yourself before others is not shallow. It is a kindness you grant to those close to you. Those who know you, the real you. To those who love you. Because if you do not love and know yourself, you cannot know and love someone else. It is a message as old as time and a message I would like to re-write in my own words. For someone to love and know others, they must love and know where that love and knowledge originated from. For if they don't, they don't understand what it is to know something nor love it. How would you know a feeling that you have not felt for yourself? I have felt anger for myself, guilt for myself, pity for my self and jealousy for myself. (Jealous of my writing not being able to be voiced) I have felt love for myself therefore can and do love others. I love my boyfriend, my family, my friends. I truly do feel for them what I feel for myself. This is the note I wish to share and save for myself. To remember, that I do love my readers. For they love themselves and me. Or at least enjoy themselves and me. I share happiness with them. I enjoy them. 

To My Readers.

Write, Read, Enjoy. 

Don't Listen To Shit Unless You Have Their Dick

Guys & Their Emotions; Why My Generation Is Fucked

Guys have emotions. (Oh My Fucking God...SHOCK... for older people.) For so long guys have been told to suck it up and be MANLY. But now we have, "you depressed? Naaaaah, talk about your feelings and open up, please PLEASE tell me how you feel". In the good old days when this message was first starting to get out, men laughed at the idea of feelings. "Feelings?! What are these feeling you talk of?" Now, guys open up to every single vagina they see. I miss the days when they tried to open up the vagina rather than open up to it. It is awesome, totally awesome, that the gals that actually want to hear about how their man is can now better understand them. (bleurgh) But for all the girls who have to suffer through hours and hours and text message after text message of how they feel and how depressed and desperate they are, it's A TOTAL NIGHTMARE! Hey, if I want to hear a repeated "i'm depressed and clueless but don't know it" story i'd listen to depressing country music. I don't need every guy friend I have to open up to me and tell me the same damn story again and again about how they thing they're loosing a girl or they haven't achieved in their life. I've heard it once, I tried to help, if you didn't take my advice then fuck off, if my advice didn't work, THEN WHY DO YOU TELL ME THIS SHIT? I WILL CONTINUE THE SAME ADVICE. If you just want someone to talk to...., there are therapists who get paid for that shit. Talk to them. I won't help. I don't know how the male mind works man FUCK. I don't even know how women think or feel. I don't get people, don't tell me anything. God! The only girls/women who want to hear about your feelings are those who ask you, mothers and girlfriends. Girlfriends listen to that stuff so you think we're understanding and we can get an orgasm by the end of it. Really, most of us who own a vagina are more heartless and selfish than you think. The worst kind of emotion-having man there is are the ones that open up to those who have been "friend-zoned". We women-friends will help you out with your problems, but only when you tell us a problem then give us a few months to breath, then another DIFFERENT problem. We'll pat your back and shit, give you advice. Hope you go through it. Those who don't further ask about your problems don't want to hear them. So.... STOP PURSUING SYMPATHY!! If you get any from us cold, heartless bitches; it's most probably fake. I, luckily, haven't heard a guys relationship problem in a while. I make sure that every single one thinks that I am too self-obsessed with my own problems to listen to theirs (therefore not willing to lend an ear) I've also spent years getting too involved in people's problems and making their bad situations worse (therefore not a good advice giver). I don't see how I have male friends, but I still do. Must be my amazing humor and smashing good looks. xD To the women who get vagina talk from penis having people, I feel sorry for you; try my method. For the men who have vaginas. Stop. Look for someone who cares before talking to them. Try a therapist. I have one. It's awesome. Women, keep trying to get into their genitals. They'll most probably be so caught up in the chance to have sex with you that they won't even bother about emotions anymore. Don't want their sex? Tease the fuck out of them. :P Moral of this rant: Don't listen to their emotional crap, unless you get a damn good sexual favour in return. I know, I've helped you so much. 

Be Happy My Readers!

P.S. ....Angry about this blog? Talk to a therapist. :)

Autobiographies, Blogs, Facebook. Twitter.

A, B, F, T. Just a Thought

They went from autobiographies to blogs to facebook to twitter. Famous *ahem* rich people used to tell people about their lives by writing books, then the wonderful internet provided away from these famous *ahem* rich people to put their lives into shorter, easier, daily way for people to know about their lives. They wrote long blogs to tell people about their lives on fancy sites that got people paid to be read. Then we had facebook, even shorter stories were written to update people on their lives. Now, there's twitter. The way famous ......rich, update people on their lives have become shorter and shorter, showing the world how annoyingly short our attention spans have become. Also, the fact that these things are now available for anyone to write is showing how everyone subconsciously wants to be famous. I say famous because it's the easiest way to say, loved, cared about and known. We want people to know about us. What we're doing, what we're thinking. We want people to care. You all probably already know this. You all probably don't care that we're doing this. But I do. It disturbs me that we all use technology to be "famous". I miss the old ways. The days where we connected and shared by talking to people face to face. By conversing, sharing, really knowing a person, reading their body language, hearing their tone, feeling them. Through voice, tone, touch. I love techonology, I really do, I'm writing on a blog for crying out loud. But we should really be using it to connect. Not to be connected. What's next? Daily words to describe what we did and how we feel? Just a thought. ...Love me.

NothingAvailable

Nothing Available

I've spent the last 20 minutes to create this blog as well as a twitter account. Why? Because nothing is available. Ever. It's hard to stay technologically connected when your name is incredibly boring. Emily Richardson. No middle name, nickname is too confusing and I just don't have 2 or 3 cool exciting and original words to describe me. Fuck. I know others have the exact same problem. If you do, I apologise. Why do I apologise? I apologise that there are so many of you like me, I just add to the problem. So do you. ...fuck you. -.- My blogs will be more interesting as time goes by. Most will be poetry, short stories, maybe even diary entries. But today, I shall rage. For I have been off my anti depressants for 4 days. You can't add so many new blogs and accounts without raging. You should see me facebook page. :P